1
“Hey, see you soon?”
Read a text from E, 36, Spanish, 183cm tall. I was at NAIA Terminal 2 having breakfast with Gino and Makie at Jollibee. By pure coincidence, he and I were both traveling to Siquijor, taking the same 8am PAL flight to Dumaguete. It could have been the perfect meet-cute but I had stopped talking to this guy few days before the trip. I had no intention of meeting him anymore because I was decidedly put off by the last conversation we had. I thought we were having an innocent exchange about our itineraries until he asked to “Show me some pics of you in the beach” (sic). I would have let it go if he didn’t press for a “small teaser” after I said no. You know as a dalagang Filipina, we don’t like that kind of vibe. Charot!
I tasked Karl, who was already inside the terminal, to keep a lookout for him because I was determined not to make any eye contact. We eventually spotted him. Karl said he was checking me out but I pretended not to notice. For a second, I was worried I was going to be seated next to him on the plane. He was seated one row ahead of me!
Today I received some texts from him. “How was Siquijor?” and “I think I saw you at the airport.” How is this guy still so persistent after I, for lack of better jargon, ghosted him. Karl said it could have just been a snafu moment but I think not. Delete chat!
2
This next tale is NSFW, but not for the reasons you might think. I subscribed to a premium plan so I could see exactly who liked my profile. I don’t have time to play a guessing game with my potential matches. Imagine my shock one early morning when I caught a very familiar face—it’s one of our relationship managers from one of our service providers! I won’t provide any identifying information, lest word get out. LOL. There are many ways I could interpret this, but I went with a simple one: he saw my profile and liked it out of courtesy. I didn’t know what to do with it. One way or another, we were going to find out that we’re both on the app anyway so I liked him back! To be clear, I think there’s absolutely no shame in being on a dating app, but it just hits different when you see someone there that you know in real life. I decided to break the awkwardness and sent a note to make light of the situation: “Hahaha, fancy meeting you here!”.
Then, the audacity of him to respond with: “Hahaha, it’s a small world, not sure it’s wise to mix business with pleasure.” Excuse me, you liked me first!
I received an email from him yesterday asking for my availability for a business lunch. He arranged it for next week along with his other colleagues. This is going to be interesting. LOL
3
Then there’s Sam. Great on paper—lawyer for a big bank, half-Aussie, half-Filipino. He was the first one to ask me out for drinks, which turned into dinner and more drinks after I mentioned I wanted to grab a bite after my run. He asked for my preferences and gave me options which I found quite thoughtful and considerate. We settled for Korean BBQ. I arrived a few minutes before him at the restaurant. When he saw me, he went in for a hug, but I went for a handshake instead. But what is the protocol for meeting someone you barely even know? We had been chatting briefly for a couple of days so we were still practically strangers. I thought a hug was too soon, but in hindsight, maybe the handshake came across as stand-offish.
Anyway, we had a good dinner and some solid conversation. I offered to split the bill, but he insisted on covering it. After the restaurant kicked us out, we walked around for a bit. When he dropped me off at the train station, I decided he deserved a hug. He asked if I got home okay afterward, which was really gentlemanly of him. But here’s the catch: I didn’t feel a spark.
When I told my friends, they said maybe I’m so used to chasing red flags that I can’t recognize a green flag when I see one and that I should give it a chance. I’m open to it, but his texts have been sporadic, and I haven’t heard from him in a few days. I think there’s also merit to just letting things be and not force a connection where there’s none.
It was an eventful first week of giving online dating a proper try. My friends and I have had some good laughs about it, and it’s been an entertaining experience so far. I also feel like I’m learning more about myself as I talk to some of these men. Because I’ve grown to be more self-assured over the years, I’m able to discern very quickly what I’m willing and unwilling to put up with.
As of this writing, the app tells me I have 300+ likes on my profile. Half of them are probably either creeps or scammers! And I’m supposed to find “the one” from them? I’m not sure I will, but even if I don’t find success on the app, it’s been a good social experiment.
So, why am I sharing these stories? For one, I think they’re quite fun and come with some moral lessons to learn. For two, this is my way of signaling to the universe that, hey, I’m ready for some romance in my life again. Lord, pakigalaw na ang baso! Lalo na po dun sa French na may six pack! Charot!